Let’s talk about Massholes.
Now, I know what you’re thinking. “It takes one to know one!” Let’s get things straight here today, people.
Let me, first, defend the innocent nature of the term. Massachusetts drivers, especially in the city, need to be aggressive in order to survive here. We’re dealing with one way streets, narrow passageways, street parking and city traffic.
Now, there is a difference between trying to survive in 5 o’clock traffic, and just being a plain old abrasive asshole; swerving LITERALLY into a non-existent lane to cut the line at a red light and zoom past; to pull out of your side-street-with-a-stop sign and cut off oncoming traffic without yielding and almost T-boning people; or cutting a line of cars by going into the other lane of oncoming traffic and then trying to get back in the line when a car starts coming for you, but the original line isn’t moving so you block the oncoming traffic and create a cluster****. UHM, NO, you’re the (m)asshole. I don’t do that!
I found an interesting article on the Boston Globe (that ironically features an interview from the owner of an auto school in my hometown) that discusses the derivation of the term “masshole.” A woman from Maine paralleled with my thoughts exactly: that although the word seems to have a negative connotation, it’s more of a broad term to describe our, maybe our less “laid-back,” approach to driving. I understand that I was born into being “one of them,” maybe I do cut people off and have a bit of internal road rage from time to time (that’s not so bad), but Boston MADE ME THAT WAY. I was never like this, and people are just rude. You’d never make it out of the parking lot if you weren’t a little hot on the pedal. With that being said, I can assure you I’m not going to flip you off, swerve in and out of pedestrians, run red lights, or cut the line into oncoming traffic to get where I need to be. You know, in New Hampshire we were encouraged to live freely but we didn’t take advantage of it like that. God, I miss it.
My question is: how did people get like this? To the point of there being no rules for them to abide to on the road, living up to the facade of being a Bostonian? Tell me that!
For the pasta, you’ll need:
- 1 large red pepper, sliced
- 1 heirloom tomato, chopped with juices
- 1/2 white onion, chopped
- 1 tbsp garlic, minced
- 1/2 lb bow tie pasta
- 1 tsp capers
- 3/4 cup chicken broth
- 1/2 cup water
- 2 tbsp goat cheese
- Parmesan cheese
- Olive oil
- Salt and pepper
Sauté the onion in olive oil over medium heat. Add garlic. When aromatic, add red pepper and tomato, capers, sprinkle with salt, pepper, toss to mix.
Cook for about 4 minutes, pour in pasta with broth and water. Cover and bring to a boil. (Add water if pasta does not cook all the way through until al dente).
Once pasta is done, veggies are soft, and a sauce is acquired, add in cheeses, sprinkle with olive oil, more salt and pepper, and toss to mix.
Pair with a cheap white wine from Trader Joes and shove in mouth until you fall asleep face first in the bowl.
P.S. It’s cheesier than it looks.